Mad Ma Morgain


Mad Ma Morgain

Watch out now.  Hide your hard candies and

turn up the volume on the radio.

Mad Ma Morgain is back in town and this time

her hair pins are in extra tight and

she brought her children, better known as

her left and right arms.

If we’re lucky we’ll get a look at “Left & Right”

She just gives the nod and it shall be done.

If that doesn’t work, she knows how to

make your life miserable behind the scenes.

So make sure you put out the blue sugar packets

and the jam better be seedless or you just

might end up on the brass end of her cane.


Old Cal Calhoun

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Old Cal Calhoun

Cal is old.  He has never had another nickname because he

has always been older than everyone.

There is no one that can actually verify his age.

His glasses cause accidents, and mass ant burnings.

Cal has conversations with his knees and elbows.

He tells them to do things, but they don’t listen.

Cal’s memory is in black and white, and silent.

Cal used to rob banks in his heyday; and by heyday I mean

when banks were a chest at the foot of your bed.

In his most recent attempts, the police politely escort

him out the door before he can pull out his bow and arrow.

“Top Hat” O’Malley

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“Top Hat” O’Malley

They say money doesn’t buy happiness, but it

sure does buy some sleaze.  “Tophat” is shrewd.

He plays three card monte with one card.

He once negotiated a homeless man

out of a wooden nickle and his teeth.

He’s all brains above the brim.  I’ve seen him

without the hat, trust me, it’s not a good sight.

He packs a single round pistol under that jacket

for when he can’t seal the deal.

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