Mickey “The Mole” McMann

mickey the mole mcmann daily mobster sketchbookjack illustration cartoon character black and white gangster mobster

Mickey “The Mole” McMann

(In the conversational style of Edward G. Robinson)

Micky, Micky, Micky. What ever will we do with you?

You’re fingers are already all busted for snitching on others.

Did you really think we’d never find out you were a mole?

You really thought that you could get away with it for this long?

Answer me Mickey.  Answer me!

Mickey, you keep getting caught and blowing your cover.

Are you really too blind to see your act is starting to slip?

Maybe it’s time to hang up the hat, take a load off, huh Mickey?

Wouldn’t you like to take a rest from all this?

Answer me Mickey. Answer me!

What are you, mute? Can’t talk?

So busy ratting out others, working from the inside,

you have no story of your own anymore?

You’re dead to me Mickey, dead.  You hear me? Dead.

Answer me Mickey! Answer Me!

Advertisements

The Ghost of Jacob Mobster

the daily mobster - ghost of jacob mobster - charles dickens

The Ghost of Jacob Mobster

(In the style of a pompous Englishman)

Chains were rattling, on Christmas Eve night.

A ghost was to come and give quite a fright.

Carrying the weight for all of his crimes,

punished as a ghost, forever, all times.

To warn all the crooks, thieves and burg-lars.

and tell the story of a life behind bars.

Screaming, wailing, crying in the street,

hoping that no one would be his repeat.

No robbing, no stealing, extortion no more,

or pain and suffering would be in store.

While families all gather, in peace for one night

a repentant reminder, he’s just out of sight.

While Santa brings gifts to good kids on his list,

Jacob clutches the naughties, tight in his fist.

His chains are dragging, marking the snow,

to remind us, he came, he hopes we all know.

Ray Gunn

Spaceman astronaut cosmonaut detective daily mobster special agent ray gun vest helmet sketchbookjack character design

Special Agent Ray Gunn

(In an alliterative alternating alphabetical style)

The administer of audits to

astronautical aberrant assemblies.

Beware, bad beings!  Blasting boundaries

by breaking up brigades of bandits.

Conducting cross-examinations, convinced

of cosmological criminal conspiracies.

The Directing Detective, at the

Department of Dendrochronological Dissonance,

eagerly explores extralegal extraterrestrials

 as the egalitarian, earthling exponent.

Fiercely foraging the future for

felonious, futuristic fugitives,

he gratefully gathers the goods on

greedy, galactic gangsters.

Hopefully, helping harmony here, from

horrible hypothetical hooligans.

He is: Special Agent Ray Gunn.

Specially designed for the Ray Gun illustration blog.

“Crow” McCay

The Crow McCay Daily Mobster Cartoon Character Design Gangster Nose Trenchcoat black illustration retro turtleneck

“Crow” McCay

Perched up on the telephone pole,

sits a quiet, lonely soul.

Waiting, watching silently,

before swooping down violently.

In this town, there’s no lost-and-found

“Crow” picks up goodies dropped on the ground.

Coins, and jewels that folks may drop,

he can see it all from way up top.

Collecting and scavenging, keeping a stash

then off to the “Crow Bar” to spend his cash.

Just a common thief, a lonely birder,

working alone, avoiding things like murder.

First to the street before the sweepers,

finders keepers, losers weepers.

Illustration Friday: “Lonely”

Senor Suspendador

Daily Mobster Character Design Cartoon Illustration Cat Burglar Robber Thief Suspenders Hanging Key

Señor Suspendador

Scoot, Scurry, Scramble!

Sue Spence spawns similar swinging swindler!

Sadly, seven souls site scamming situations.

Shoppers suspect shoplifting; some see stealing.

Suspended somewhere, swings Señor Suspendador.

Señor’s sneaky scheme sidesteps security systems.

Señor skips surveillance, skillfully simulating shadows.

Six savings storehouses succumb. Stickup, stickup!

Scared salary savers stampede, silver stockers scream!

Señor skips showily, stashing stolen savings.

Señor Suspendador slights Sue Spence, saying,

“Señor’s scamming surpasses Sue!

Suckers!”

For Illustration Friday’s: Suspend

“The Box” Burlington

cube box square head bowler hat daily mobster vest bow tie cartoon character design burlington illustration gangster

“The Box” Burlington

Burlington  is the owner of the restaurant on the corner.

No tricky business here, he bought it fair and square;

he was just thinking outside the box, icebox that is.

Everything outside the icebox is legal.

But for the owner of a restaurant, I must say

“Box” is a little rough around the edges.

I can’t say he’s very well rounded,

but don’t get me wrong, he ain’t no square.

Baby Face Morten gets the cubed steak and  The Mayor

loves the linguine squarciarella, the house specialty.

It’s cooking in the kitchen, like ninety degrees hot.

Just don’t get sent to the icebox.

“Sidecar” Sid

sidecar motorcycle biker sid daily mobster sketchbookjack character design illustration cartoon gangster scarf goggles leather jacket bandana

“Sidecar” Sid

He’s the fastest driver that’s ever been,

aiding getaways since nineteen ten.

Fastest thing on four wheels or two,

hold on tight, he’s coming through.

No cars for him, you might think it bizarre,

so you’ll have to ride in the sidecar.

Sid once had to help three thugs flee,

that was quite the sight to see.

Three sidecars all in a daisy chain,

zipping through traffic, lane to lane.

Sid’s plaid scarf was flapping in the wind,

was the last thing they saw before giving in.

“Sidecar” Sid escapes again!

He is driving the coppers totally insane.

But he’s not just a gangster livery,

He also does Chinese delivery!

Lucca “Lucha” Libre

daily mobster sketchbookjack lucca lucha libre luchador cartoon character design illustartion black and white suit tie

Lucca “Lucha” Libre

The masked man strikes again!

Extortion, robberies, and smuggling abound.

No one knows what he really looks like,

not even his mom!

(We know, we interrogated her.)

If you have seen this man, been robbed by this man,

or recently clothes-lined, flying monkeyed, or body slammed,

please contact local authorities immediately.

There has been a rash of sightings and it is unclear

if there is a mob of these men, or just one, changing masks.

Be on the look out for Lucha Libre wrestlers in your neighborhood.

Last seen wearing a white suit, black tie, a fedora

and a luchador mask.

We believe his name is Lucca. Lucca Libre.

Leo Black

The 50th Mobster!

leo black old man daily mobster sketchbookjack character design cartoon illustration gangster hat cigar big nose

Leo Black

(In the style of a 1930s Jim Croce)

Drive in his car, he’ll play the guitar,

sit right back and he’ll sing you a track.

Grumpy, frumpy, old and lumpy,

this big boss is Leo Black.

Shrewd, crude and rather rude,

he controls the land, south of the track.

Joking, smoking, always provoking

everyone from the river and back.

There was a sighting, which incited fighting,

when I got lost and found Mickey Mac.

Chaw was smacking, knuckles cracking,

I said, “Hey, Mac, cut me some slack.”

Mac grinned in the wind, and I was pinned

“Hey, I’m just a kid, and they call me Jack.”

Down on the ground, in the wrong part of town,

I needed something to stop this attack.

Black came out from my car, with my guitar,

Mac looked at him crazy, as he began to unpack.

“What’s with the case, gonna sing us a song?”

The boys came at Black to give him flak.

Then the boys all fled, away from the lead,

shooting from the case, clack clack clack!

Leo Black may be mad and real bad,

I’m just glad Black had my back.

Judge Atticus

judge justice atticus bribe daily mobster cartoon character design illustration sketchbookjack

Judge Atticus

(In the style of Jeremy Irons)

Oh, Judge Atticus, appointed for life.

Must be nice to be free from strife.

Trials in and trials out,

you seemingly judge without a doubt.

But we wonder why mob bosses run free.

Could it be, you’ve taken a fee?

Even when couples come to court to be hitched,

it seems as though you become more enriched.

The gavel comes down on a poor man, blamed.

Yet everyone knows that he’s surely been framed.

They say justice should be objective and blind.

The latter is covered, with glasses of that kind.

But the scales you carry do not weigh facts.

They weigh something green, let’s call it a “tax.”

For Illustration Friday‘s: “Hitched”

Enter your email to receive notifications of posts by email.

Sketchbook Jack

Visit the Blog

Follow Twitter

%d bloggers like this: