Benny Bass

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Benny Bass

Ah Benny Bass, the final member of “The Barbershop Quartet”.

Strangely, there are only three members.

Benny got lucky. His surname defined his career path.

It’s Bass, not Bass, and don’t mistake it.

His daddy was “Big Mouth” Bass,

and his mama was “Washtub Bass.”

The whole family is a bit, tightly strung.

They don’t fret over slappin‘ a Bass, poppin‘ a Bass or

beatin’ the bagatelle outta you with some brass.

He hits the lowest note ever registered, the low R flat.

Benny looks good in his barbershop suit; he calls

himself the “Striped” Bass.

Like I said, it’s Bass, not Bass. How many

times did you say Bass and not Bass?

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Barry “Baritone”

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Barry “Baritone”

Barry inherited the barbershop from Great Uncle Arpeggio.

There is minor modulation in his monotone mumbles.

It’s unclear if he is even aware of the ongoings

of “The Barbershop Quartet” gang, because

the coppers tried a lie detector and his answers always

came out the same.  They even tried a micro-expressionist

but his face never changed.

If nothing else, they’ve got Barry for association,

or acting as a drone. But, if I had to guess his association with the gang,

I bet Barry just cuts hair

and hits a mean middle C.

See The Daily Mobster Process of Barry “Baritone” by SketchbookJack

Timmy “Tenor”

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Timmy “Tenor”

Take note or at least a quarter note.

Timmy is the tenor in the crime gang known as

“The Barbershop Quartet.”

He keeps his razors like he hits his high G, sharp.

You always know when Timmy gets to work;

He doesn’t know when to come in and can’t find the key.

At the bar, Timmy sits by the register and

drinks a duet of coda water and tonic.

Be careful when you ask for a close shave,

people have gone missing before.

This guy is treble, I mean trouble.

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