Bruce Boxer

bruce the boxer fighter daily mobster sketchbookjack character design illustration cartoon

Bruce Boxer

(In the alliterative key of B)

Boxing buffs, bring big bucks!

Booking bets before boxing bell bangs!

Buy big beers by betting boxes!

Brace before brilliant battles.

Bruce Boxer brawls Big Bad Bart!

Boss Boston bets Bruce Boxer beats Big Bad Bart.

Bam, Boom, Bang, Bop! Bloody, bruising bludgeoning!

Bruce busts Bart’s belly. Bart bangs Bruce’s back.

Bruce bounces back, bashing Bart’s breast.

Bart bounds, besieging below Bruce’s belt.

Bruce bends, broken, but boxing bells bing!

Boss Boston beckons Bruce. Boss binds bricks

between Bruce’s boxing bindings.

Boxing buzzer buzzes!

Bruce boomerangs, backfiring Bart,

bloodying brains, breaking bones.

Bart befalls blackout.

Bruce buries bricks behind back before being barred.

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The Bowler

the_bowler_bowling_ball_suit_hat_daily_mobster_cartoon_character_illustration_design

The Bowler

No one knows who he works for or what he does.

“The Bowler” has been seen walking down allies at night.

He was last seen in a bowler hat, bowling shoes,

a black suit, polka dot tie, and carrying two bowling balls.

Maybe he carries a second one as a spare?

There has been a rash of vandalism in the area,

mostly “downed gutters” reported.

Houses with the address 710 have been split in half!

Houses numbered 300 have reported

“random acts of fine gardening”

and “gold rings left upon doorsteps.”

He has no record so we can’t call foul,

but let’s call this one a strike.

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